I forgot, high school drama is clearly a matter of life or death

I remember when I was a freshman in high school, Shelley had a crush on Damon, and Holly has a crush on Scott, and the Shelley and Holly got into an argument, and Shelley wanted to have a “wedding” to Damon in the choir room during lunch and have the music teacher perform it.  And Scott made a mixed tape for Holly, and OMG it was high drama and everything was life or death, and people were choosing sides.  And then my mother suggested that maybe I should just step away and not be friends with any of them because clearly I was getting too involved in their personal lives and it was not healthy for me, with all the drama and the stress and I thought she had completely lost her mind because clearly my friends needed me, and how could I just walk away from something this exciting?

Now that I’m a mother of a freshman?  I understand my mother a whole lot better.  (Mom you might want to copy this and save it because I’m not sure how many more times I will ever admit that.)

And so it was last night, when the girls (because clearly Megan has to have her nose in her sister’s business helping to stir the pot and keeping the drama going) were in the middle of some serious life or death drama, my I’ve-been-there-done-that suggestions were going largely ignored, and getting some serious eye rolls.

I know longer know how or when this drama started but it’s been going on most of this school year.  It seems that a girl Meredith has been pretty close to for the past two years has decided to not only turn her back on Meredith, but to be a real bitch about it.  She is  refusing to acknowledge Meredith, slamming her locker in Meredith’s face, and telling Meredith that Mere’s friends really aren’t her friends and they are talking about her behind her back.

To be fair I don’t know this other girl’s side of the story.  I also only know Meredith’s side of the story, and of course she will paint herself in the best possible light.  Maybe there is a reason that she is not talking to my daughter, but the being rude and slamming lockers and just being mean-spirited is unwarranted.  And also, typical high school drama queen behavior.

So last night, all the kids in the neighborhood were hanging out after school.  Meredith asked this other girl “What did I do to piss you off?  What the hell is going on?”

The response?

Rolled eyes, and stormed off.

Meredith never did get an answer.  The other girl wouldn’t even talk to her.

I had to hear Meredith tell me this story over and over and over again.  And when Megan came in, it was more of the same. Over and over again.

Until my head was ready to explode.  Until I could no longer stand the pressure of the stress it was causing them.

Of course, my solution to the problem was just go about your day as if she’s not there.  Don’t try to speak to her, don’t try to engage her, clearly she’s not interested in finding any kind of middle ground, so just let it go. Which clearly they can’t do because this is a matter of life or death.

Except that it’s not, really.

But to them it is.  And will continue to be, until it’s resolved.  And the entire freshman class has been forced to choose sides.

Please pass the vodka.

I live with Bert and Ernie only with vaginas.

People? This is the best Bert and Ernie book. Ever. It was one of my sister’s favorites when she was a child.  Ok, I don’t know that for a fact. It was one of MY favorites when she was a child.

If you haven’t read it, (and clearly most of you probably haven’t) it’s the story of how Ernie bought some cookies but broke the cookie jar, so he has to put the cookies in the sugar bowl, and the sugar in a flower-pot, and one thing leads to another ending with the fish in Bert’s cowboy hat.  So Bert has to wear a pot on his head when he wants to play “Ride ’em cowboy.”   People? That is a direct quote, do not laugh at me.

This weekend, the girls and I stopped at Sonic on our way back from The Lake. (who we were with is a blog post for another day).  A few miles down the road,  the following conversation took place in the back seat of the car.

Newt: Here, Tate, Hold your Sonic food.

Tate:  Why should I hold my Sonic food?

Newt: Because I have to put my food in your Sonic Bag.

Tate:  Why can’t you put your food in your bag?

Newt: Because mine has a soda in it.

Tate: Why does your bag have a soda in it?

Newt: Because the cup holder is full.

Tate: The cup holder is full?  Of what?

Newt: Books.

Tate: What?  Why are their books in the cup holder?

Newt: Because I don’t want them on the floor on my feet.

Tate: So what I supposed to do with my Sonic food if you’re using my bag?

Newt: Hold it on your lap?

People?  I can not make this shit up.

My Mother's Day Wish-Hope-Prayer

My Mother’s Day Confession:

I am afraid my mental illness will keep me from being the mother my daughters deserve.

There.

I typed it.

One of my deepest fears.

I fear that no matter how hard I fight, no matter how hard I try to sheild them, my mental illness will scar them, will somehow effect them, hurt them, for life….

I am afraid that when they look back at their childhood they will only remember the tears, the rages, the mood swings, my desperate desire to escape the world and be alone.  That when they look back they will only see the illness and not how hard I fought to keep it from them.

I want them to know… I love them, I’m proud of them, they are my world, and I fight with everything in me to keep the demons in my head, in my head and away from them.

Please let me suceed.